Love and Marriage: Part 2 - Art of Dating
Scripture: Song of Solomon 1:8–2:7
Dating doesn’t just apply to those who are contemplating marriage, but also to those who are married. It is an integral part of relationships between men and women. Every relationship we have is God’s gift to us to learn how to have a relationship with Him. The reason to date well is not just to have a good love life, but to have a good worship life.
Women outsmart and outnumber men. They think about relationships and marriage much more than men. They plan and prepare to attract men. They wear make-up and make themselves attractive to men. They find ways to be noticed by men. Women believe what other people tell them about their beauty. They see in themselves what they hear others say. Men need to learn to talk to women and affirm them. This starts with fathers affirming their daughters. This will lay the foundation for healthy self-esteem in adolescence and adulthood.
Women are erotic. They think about intimacy and how to attract men toward them. They try to hide it and keep it in its proper place. Men need to demonstrate self-control in the relationship to avoid moving toward intimacy sooner than is appropriate.
Relationships will always either circle upward or spiral downward. It takes effort to move it upward. The problem with relationships is when we try to meet our own needs rather than meeting the needs of the other. When a woman meets the needs of the man, it is easier for man to meet the woman’s needs. The reverse is true also. If men get lazy in the relationship it will drop off. Women will feel neglected and betrayed. If each person prioritized the needs of the other both of their needs will be met.
Men control the timing of intimacy. Intimacy must not be rushed. Once a man wins a woman’s heart she will give the rest of herself. God placed desires in us to we could live a full, blessed and healthy life. The most precious intimate gift a woman can give to a man is her body. The most precious gift a man can give a woman is commitment. Living together prior to marriage makes it more difficult to leave a relationship that is not working.
Godly dating is practice for worship. The reason to date well is not merely to have a God honoring marriage, but how to give God what is most precious and most intimate in His honor.
More in Love and Marriage
April 9, 2017Love and Marriage - Part 11: The Art of Faithfulness
April 2, 2017Love and Marriage - Part 10: The Art of Deepening
March 26, 2017Love and Marriage - Part 9: The Art of Romance