Husbands Need Helpers
Then the Lord God said, “It is not good that the man should be alone; I will make him a helper fit for him.”
Leslie and I have been married for 18 years. I recall one particularly magical moment where it all clicked for me. I realized at this moment that she was the one for me! It was in our dating years: I was in a really tough season of life, struggling in business school. There were layoffs at my work, and I was feeling a little lost as to direction. I was likely depressed and definitely greatly discouraged. I had a date with Leslie. We went to one of my favorite spots, along the bank of the Arkansas river in the downtown area of Little Rock.
Early in the evening, I was vulnerable and shared my heart with her and how I wanted to walk away from ministry for various reasons. She patiently listened and comforted me. She also shared how important my role was in ministry. After her help that night, I’ve never looked back. I never doubted my call ever again. I had at that moment the help I needed. I had someone that believed in me, even when I didn’t. It also solidified for me that she was my perfect helpmate in life. I knew the road of ministry would be hard, and I didn’t want to do it alone. Since that time, we plowed the fields of ministry together. We have seen thousands of people come to faith in Christ, traveled internationally for missions, planted a church in the Phoenix Valley, and most importantly built a family that loves and lives for Jesus.
The truth is, ladies, that your man is going to struggle. He is going to doubt himself and he’s going to need you to help him get through whatever he’s going through. Sometimes that will be a short period of time, other times it’s a long difficult season. God has called you to be his help. It’s a similar title to that of the third member of the Trinity: the Helper, the Holy Spirit. That doesn’t mean you become his Holy Spirit in trying to convict him about everything, by nagging him; rather that you help him by supporting him, encouraging him, and respecting him as a man in the world that he’s trying to conquer. There is hardly ever a time we see great men without great ladies around them. Even in the life of Jesus, there was a team of ministry-minded women that supported him. In the marriage, the man has a great need of a helper if he’s to serve as the head of the household and take on that God-given responsibility. That’s a heavy responsibility, but Godly husbands are like tough trucks. You can load ‘em up and they ride smoother. Trust me, wives, your husband will appreciate your support and encouragement with the burdens he bears.
For the husband, don’t be afraid to ask for help, don’t be too proud. God knows you need help. God didn’t design you to lead your family without help. Ask for help from your wife in any area you lack wisdom. This may financial, relational, or spiritual. It’s ok, God doesn’t expect you to know everything and do everything. He’s given you a helper in life!
God knows I would be a disaster without a wife. I lean on Leslie to help me in so many areas of my life, and I credit her to have helped me do all that we’ve been able to do. It’s been a team effort – she’s not only my partner in ministry but my friend and my lover. I rely on her help, her spiritual insight, and wisdom in navigating relationships on a daily basis.
Let’s take a minute in prayer and pray for all the helpers out there that are helping their husbands be all that God has called them to be. Let’s as well pray for the husband to not try to do it all themselves, but rely on help from their wives and that by doing so will build a stronger marriage and shine a brighter light of God’s love to others around them!